I Am Not Myself These Days: A Memoir

I Am Not Myself These Days: A Memoir

By Josh Kilmer-Purcell

It’s no secret to anyone who knows me: I am obsessed with drag queens. I love them. I want to be one, which I know is weird considering that I am a girl and could very easily dress myself up and parade around, but man, it’s just so much effort.

Anyway, I have an equal passion for the television show “The Fabulous Beekman Boys.” One of the two men on the show, Josh, for whom I have a soft-spot in my heart, is also a celebrated writer of memoirs. I decided to give his work a try with much trepidation in my heart. What if it was terrible? What if he is a boring writer? What if he has no talent? Would it change my love for him?

You’re probably already wondering the connection between these two loves and this book review. Well, Josh was once a drag queen before he and his long-time partner bought a farm in upstate New York, raise goats, and sell artisan cheeses, soaps, and other goat’s milk products.

It’s all coming together now, right?

Anyway, I read the book and was hoping only for the possibility that it would be bearable. I read the first words nervously and quickly found myself racing to each new page, hungry for just one more page…

AMAZING NEWS ladies and gentlemen!!! I Am Not Myself These Days is an awesome book! Kilmer-Purcell is a wonderful writer and is able to intricately combine humor with tenderness and a fierce bluntness.

This is the story of K-P’s first few months in New York and his complicated romantic relationship with, Jack, a male prostitute who showers K-P in luxury while losing himself in secrecy and drug-addiction. K-P, who dances back and forth between himself and Aqua, his drag persona, all the while drowning in an overwhelming alcoholism and codependency. This book is painfully candid and absolutely lovely in its honesty and description.

I was shocked to see where he once was though, somehow, also caught up in the thrill of suspense of what might happen, even though I know full-well where he ended up and who he ended up with.

This is a unique memoir of a unique story that somehow seems completely relatable. Apparently, we all have something in common and something to be learned from an alcoholic drag queen who wears goldfish in her titties and dates a man who is paid to tie up slaves and pee on their faces for a living.

I loved it. I can’t wait to read his other works and I can’t wait till the show comes back for season three.

Read it. Love it. You’re welcome.